Well, you were never REALLY...

Good morning, evening, and everything between the two (in either direction). I'm back to the blog with a post that supersedes all of the drafts and ideas that I have lined up, simply because it keeps coming up.

From time to time, some of us go through major lifestyle changes  - sexuality, religion, even just personal interests - that those around us may or may not agree with. I know, right? Who cares what other people think, I'mma strut my stuff! Great attitude, but you're gonna run into some snappy comments not just about where you are, but where you say you've come from. That's right, this is for all those who're familiar with "Oh, well you're X now? Then you were never REALLY Y".

One of the main things that bugs me about this statement is the audacity of an onlooker to claim to know one so intimately as to know better than one how one has thought or acted in the present OR past. Who is Jimmy to tell Annie how she used to feel? I mean, we spend so much of our lives working though our own feelings that it's insane to claim to fully understand another person, particularly someone you don't know intimately.

Another annoying thing about this is that in most cases, it doesn't really matter and is just none of your business.  Whether you feel this person offends you by claiming to have abandoned whatever reason you think works, it really doesn't affect you. It's not like they're going to try to change your country's laws based on how they USED to feel, right?

Finally, it's pretty futile. I'm not usually one to advocate rolling over and playing dead, but you won't win. If someone tells you he or she used to feel one way but now feels another, just take their word for it. Don't challenge it, because they're not going to budge. I've found that one thing some people are more set on than their present opinions is their past opinions, simply because that person's past largely defines their present; a significant portion of that person's identity may be based on the change they've gone through, and they'll hold onto that for a pretty long time.

Long story short, comments on changes in a person's life really aren't necessary or a good idea. Odds are you're wrong, and even if you're not, no one cares.

Well, popping out of hiatus, this has been your humble ranter. Happy reading, and keep thinking critically.